When was the last time you let yourself be bored? It may sound like a silly question, to which you could answer that scrolling through Instagram for too long can become mundane, or completing an assignment for work or school can be anything but exciting. But, when you really think about it, how often do you allow yourself to be purposefully idle – whether it be by daydreaming, people-watching in a busy park, or walking down the street and actually taking note of your surroundings? More importantly, when you decide to engage in these activities, how difficult do you find them to complete?
A few weeks ago, I was on a family vacation that left me without any cell phone service for an entire week. What I had hoped would be a relaxing, rejuvenating, and restorative week away from technology actually became much more profound than that. Without having my phone attached to me like another appendage on my body, I realized how much more of my life that I was actually seeing.
Instead of reaching for my phone when I was left with nothing to do, I fully immersed myself in these moments of boredom, reflection, and contemplation. In a way, I felt like a kid again – making up stories in my head about different people that passed me by, daydreaming about possible scenarios that could play out in my life, and enjoying the company of my family without any distractions. Quite honestly, it was really nice.
About halfway through my vacation, I had this Earth-shattering epiphany (which, for me, seems to happen about once a day, but I digress…). I thought to myself that, contrary to what I’ve been thinking for years, constantly keeping busy, piling as many opportunities as possible onto my plate, and striving for success at every possible minute are NOT the most important components of life. I started to ponder that, sometimes, allowing yourself to be human – to turn boredom into daydreams, happenstance encounters into friendships, and mundane events into meaningful ones – is harder than keeping busy, because we have to live through these events completely without using outside distractions as a crutch.
I realized how much I missed simply being human. When I was in college, I was operating like a machine – trying to fill my schedule up with events and obligations that would serve the purpose of making me more “well-rounded” or “marketable,” when, in reality, I couldn’t even tell you the last time I did something just because I felt like doing it. So, naturally, when I returned from my vacation, I decided to peruse the Internet for an explanation as to why I feel the need to be so busy, and I stumbled upon the Dutch word niksen, and the sheer importance that this word holds.
In her article for The New York Times, Olga Mecking suggests that we view the idea of keeping busy as a status symbol. Simply put; if we’re more involved, then we’re more in demand. This perpetuates the negative social norm that being bored, doing something just for the sake of doing it, or literally stopping to smell the roses are activities that decrease our status. I’ve definitely found myself thinking this way, and would equate doing “nothing” with being unproductive, which left me with little to no time to actually indulge in some guilt-free relaxation.
So, what is niksen? It’s actually become a bit of a buzz word over the past few years, and in a nutshell, it encompasses taking “conscious, considered time and energy to do activities like gazing out of a window or sitting motionless.” The reason we need niksen now more than ever before is because of our smartphones – with constant access to social media, texting, and apps meant to counter boredom, we never feel like we’re truly “unplugged.” As a result, our brains are being rewired to lose the ability to sit still, which can lead to complications with our mental health and wellbeing.
When we’re consumed in a project for work or school, it’s inevitable that we’ll lose some steam at some point or another. It’s difficult to find inspiration or creative rejuvenation when we’re bogged down in work for hours on end. Ironically enough, niksen can help with these mental blocks in life. it all starts with scheduling time to be bored. Do nothing. Take a walk outside without your phone. Enjoy a cup of coffee each morning without scrolling through the latest news, but rather by staring out the window and observing nature. There are so many amazing parts of life that we overlook each and every day just because we find it impossible and unorthodox to stop working so hard and simply exist.
While having goals, good work ethic, and ambition are all important, the people who are overworked may set themselves up to become less successful than the people who lack that drive in the first place. Practicing mindfulness isn’t as daunting as it sounds, and even taking just five minutes each day to sit and be reflective without distractions is an incredible step forward. At the end of our lives, we won’t look back and wish we went to more meetings, spent more time on social media, or had another assignment on our plate; we’ll wish we’d taken the time to look at life through our own eyes and live fully in the moment. In a world that never stops moving, allow yourself to take a break, because it can be just what you need to discover your next big idea.
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